Selfcare

As today is World mental health day I wanted to share firstly my own mind health journey but also and very importantly the things I do to help myself stay well.

If you have read any of my earlier blogs I have talked extensively about my own mind health, I have had many ups and downs with mind health in the last 25 years, I have been offered antidepressants several times, I have chosen for my own personal reason to not take them although I have seen friends who have taken them and find them amazing but they are just not for me.

So I have been on a journey of self discovery, I still am on that journey and I have found many things that have helped me. I have always thought Self care is selfish, that I am not worthy or that if I look after myself I will be letting others down, if I say no to an event or to help someone they will hate me or think I’m nasty or useless.

I have had to learn that I am important, that when I look after myself I am a better version of me, I am better able to help others and I am happier and less stressed.

So with the help of a great therapist and family/friends and a huge amount of love patience and support from my husband I began my latest journey.

I left my job at a primary school, it was way to stressful, I was coming home upset and anxious, Freya was leaving primary and I felt ready to leave too and start a new chapter, I was going on a family holiday just after I left school, Jules knows my symptoms so well now, he noticed I was trying to control everything, I was wanting to be back at our holiday home as early as possible and I had started to feel the dreaded anxiety feeling in the pit of my tummy, almost like an excited feeling but with a huge amount of dread and some heart palpitations thrown in the mix.

As soon as I returned I went to my GP and asked for blood tests for my thyroid, my thyroid is a wanker, when I’m least expecting it, it will literally take the life out of me and I end up in a state.

Low and behold it was super low, so I had to take more pills, I also checked back in for CBT and I started to walk, just little walks to start with but it was a start, with the help of my therapist I became aware of the horrible ugly mush I have in my core, well obviously that’s not actually true but that’s what I see and feel, the feeling of not being worthy of self-care, the feeling of not being good enough, the feeling of letting everyone down.

This needed some work, so the thyroid pills were kicking in, the walking was getting longer, I was feeling like I could do more, so I added yoga, some meditation and reading amongst others, so I’m going to list my self-care tips, they might not work for you but they are worth a try, you can adapt them to you, if you’re not at the point of going out or are having tests , some are so simple you will think I’m slightly odd but bear with me.

• First of all get an appointment with your GP’s it is the only way to start
• Blood tests including thyroid
• Organise any therapy you are open too
• Walk outdoors if you can manage it, if not small exercises indoors
• Meditate, if your mind wonders its ok, be kind to yourself even 10 seconds of calm is great
• Yoga is fab, take it slowly, find a teacher that is sympathetic to your needs
• Bath, yes I did say bath, I took showers and never took my time to cherish my body, take a bath with candles and beautiful oils in your bath, im still learning to love my body
• Moisturize your body, again this comes naturally to some, I always saw it as waste of time, It’s so important to be kind to your body
• Cut down on social media, it’s an amazing tool to talk to people but it can be detrimental if you are already feeling low
• Talk to someone you trust, talk some more and keep talking until things make sense
• Read a good book, and put the phone down when you go to bed, read instead, preferably something uplifting or informative
• Buy yourself some flowers, candles or oils, smell the beautiful scent
• Look at your diet, nourish your body with good food, I don’t want to eat or even drink water when I’m anxious, so I have to force myself albeit gently, I find gluten makes me bloated and miserable so I have cut it out for a long time now, choose fresh veggies and spices you enjoy

This may seem like a long list, to some these will be the norm, to others all of this will be alien, take your time, one thing a day or week, most of these are now my normal, my core is not so rotten anymore and I’m finding myself (so cliché) I am on a journey, I have no idea where I’m going but I’m going to try my best to enjoy it, to cherish it and myself.

I always try to think now what I would advice my friends or family if they were feeling or thinking like I do/have, it helps me to be kinder to myself, self-care doesn’t have to cost a lot, it is just about being kind and gentle to yourself, like im sure you would be to your friends or family, its by far the best thing I have done, its come as a shock to some when I decide I can’t attend an event or when I say im not in a position to help them out, but if these people love you or respect you they will know you need this time to get well.